Adding to the Arsenal

A few weeks ago, I actually wrote out a weekly plan of activities.  I was trying to find time to add some new items to my back pack.  Three hour mandatory rest time sounds awesome, but think about 3 hours out of your already crazy day.  No electronics, no phone, nothing...Just you and your feelings and mind.  It is hard to get my mom and wife things done.  I was hoping to see time where I could do things without taking away from my family.

I was seeing Dr. Li Liu twice a week.  With travel time, that is another 2 hours away from family and chores.  She agreed that I was far enough into my treatment that I could do once a week.  So Mondays opened up.  I walk with a friend from 9 to 10.  I don't have to pick up the boys until 12 so...

Today I went to my first official yoga class at 10:30 at Be Yoga.  As soon as I walked into the doors, I instantly felt calmer and more relaxed.  If you have not visited this wonderful place, go now.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200, just go.  http://www.beyogaatlanta.com

I took Be Warm Yin with Doug.  It was amazing.  It is about quieting your mind and body.  It was perfectly aligned with what I am doing and trying to do.  I am not sure when I can squeeze in other classes, but will hopefully be able to here and there.  

Now I need to concentrate on meditating.  I am doing my version, but am sure there is a much deeper, more effective method.  Anyone an expert on that?

I am about to start my rest time and wanted to share some pictures of what I look at during that time.

My flowers this week and my gift from my sister.  How cool is that needlepoint?

What I listen to when I am resting.  

I was talking with a friend.  She wanted to know how she could help.  She cannot help me with childcare.  She cannot help me with Chop and Talk.  I told her that I can always use wheatgrass.  I am supposed to get up to 6 ounces of wheat grass shots a day.  I have to slowly build up to that because it can tear up your stomach.  But, wheat grass kills cancer cells!!  So I am happy to do it.  When I get up to 6 ounces a day, I will be spending $20 every two days on wheatgrass.  My friend is researching and planning on coming up to put a greenhouse in my backyard.  How wonderful will that be for all this green I am eating?  Growing our own wheat grass is definitely in the plans for the greenhouse.  In the meantime, I have to buy it.  I need organic.  Whole Foods is where I get it.  The other tricky part is that it last for about a week.  So if everyone brought me some, it may go to waste. So I told her a Whole Foods GC would be perfect.  She thanked me for being honest and then said that I needed to put that out there for others like her.

I will leave you with more gratitude than I can express.  While walking today, my friend said that she wished she could help more.  All she does is show up to walk with me.  But that sums up everything I have been trying to articulate.  Everyone is giving me what they can and it is more than enough.  So if you are praying.  Thank you!  It is exactly what I need.  If you send me recipes for me to try.  Perfect.  My stomach thanks you.  If you send me flowers.  Thank you.  It is definitely helping.  If you sit down for five minutes and picture the Doozers chipping away the cancer.  Awesome.  It all helps.  Every single thing that is coming my way.

Speaking of Doozers, I asked for pictures.  And I finally got one.  Here is my aunt and uncle visualizing my cancer being chipped away.  Love it.

I feel it working.  Keep chipping!!
"Dance your cares away, worries for another day."

50 Is The New 70

Went to my weekly appointment with Dr. Li Liu and she had my official results from the age test.  Recall, my age at the beginning of this was 70.  According to the test, most bodies will carry us, on average, until age 86.  So, I had 16 years left...

After 6 weeks of eating raw, drinking only Kangen water, and working on the inside with journaling and meditating, etc, my new age is 50!  I am very happy with that.  Dr. Li Liu was surprised it had improved that much in six weeks.  I failed to mention to her that I was a rockstar.

I asked her if it was possible to be younger than your actual age.  She said yes.  Challenge accepted.

Funny story.  My sister told me I could eat what I read as Cocoa Nibs.  Sounds yummy, right?  I found them on Amazon and did Subscribe and Save because I was going to eat lots of these yummy things.  My Subscribe and Save items come at the end of the month.  While I was resting, I heard the FedEx truck.  I was so excited.  Along with diapers, wipes, paper towels, etc, I knew my nibs were waiting for me.  I could taste the chocolate goodness while journaling.  I came downstairs and immediately opened the boxes.  Found the nibs, opened them up, put some in my mouth, and almost gagged.  I should have known better, right?  If it was as yummy as I was imagining, then I can't have it.  I looked closely at the package......

  A slight transposing of two letters, but a big difference in taste.  It is pronounced  kuh-kah-oh.  We tried melting it in almond butter.  I ate it with almonds.  We spent 15 minutes looking for recipes.  Most recipes called for honey or some type of sugar.  We really tried to find a way to make this taste good and give me a treat.  We finally waved the white flag.  We tried.  

My friend asked me what my treat was while talking about my diet.  My answer?  "Holding my first grandchild."  I have to remember things like this when I get frustrated about food.  

Aren't they beautiful?

I did receive some very delicious salmon from a friend.  AP, you are awesome!  Salmon is a treat for me so thank you.  I don't get to eat cocoa or cocao, but the salmon is close runner up.  Aren't they beautiful?  The color is superior to the salmon I had from Costco.  They came in dry ice and were addressed to Fancer Ford.  Isn't that wonderful?

You Are So Losing, Cancer

Received this in the mail.  I couldn't even finish reading this because I was crying so hard.  This is what this journey is about.  This is why I get up every morning with determination and hope.  There is something bigger happening here than me figuring this out.  It is about good winning.  It is about love winning.  It is about happiness winning.  It is about all of us winning.  #fancer

Round 7

My appointment was for 9:10.  Today was a chemo day that I also saw the doctor.  It is now 10:50 and I haven't even started my chemo yet.  So frustrating. (*update..I finished at 3:15.  UGH!)  But I am almost half way there!  Keep those Doozers working in your minds!

I am reading a book about exceptional patients called Love, Medicine & Miracles.  The first thing I underlined was: "Psychologist Lenoard Derogatis, in a study of 35 women with metastatic breast caner, found that the long-term survivors had poor relationships with their physicians - as judged by the physicians.  They asked a lot of questions and express their emotions freely."  And I just smiled.  This time around, I am the annoying patient.  Asking questions.  Demanding things.  Firmly saying that I do not want a particular treatment.  I am in charge.  And I probably annoy my oncologist.  But here is more proof that I will be around for a long time to keep on annoying her.  So I sat waiting and waiting and waiting and formulating what I would say when she finally walked in.  My stomach was going, but she finally walked in.

I asked, "I have been waiting for over an hour and a half.  Is there a reason why I can't start my chemo and, when you are ready to see me, I can wheel my IV pole in and talk to you?  That way my chemo will have already started."  I was nervous.  Because this just seemed to make perfect sense so there must be a reason, right?  Without skipping a beat, she replied, "That sounds perfect.  I will put that in your orders - to go straight to chemo."  And, once again, I am reminded to push and advocate for myself!!"


At Dr. Li Liu's on Friday, my body said I can have the protein (milkshake!!) shake and salmon!  At my Chop and Talk last night, I had 5 friends show up!  Not only did we chop veggies and garlic, we made Kale Chips, Chick Pea Crunchies, and yummies salads.  It was a successful night and my fridge is filled with food for me to eat and counter the chemo side effects.  Thank you, Ladies!

Hopefully you can see behind my shiny head!

My sister continues to research and research and research some more.  My mother and younger sister have joined the team.  It is so amazing that they are doing this, and are great at it, because it allows me to heal and kill the cancer cells.  They discovered that the pots and pans I have been using are leaking metal into all this great food we are preparing.  Originally she thought that ceramic was the way to go.  So I ordered a set.  Within a couple days and more research, she discovered those are leaking metals also.  I hope Amazon will take back slightly used pots and pans.  Even though it doesn't seem logical, titanium is the way to go.

I post this for two reasons: to share our knowledge.  But also, we know that we may not always be correct.  So please question any of this information and give us any you may have.  And if you happen to know about this type of cookware, please let me know.  I need to start researching a set...

When I received said ceramic cookware, it started a purging and organizing frenzy.  (I love to do both of those things ALOT.)  I save things thinking that one day I may need it and will be good to have around.  But my new lifestyle has simplified that so much.  I was throwing things in a box like nobody's business.  And it felt so good.  I can now look in my drawers and cabinets and actually see what is in there.  I threw away ALL PLASTIC (unless I didn't have a replacement yet), and metal. I would really like to get all glass tableware for the boys.  But they are still very clumsy.  I did find these adorable plates that came with a rubber, removable backing though.  We will see how the do.

My supplements

How cute are these?

Dishes by Brinware

Some plastic, but will soon replace.

Ahhhh

Looks messy, but I am loving it...

5 more treatments and we will redo the PET Scan.  Have a favor.  Please start praying for the PET Scan.  Pray that the cancer is gone or greatly reduced.  Every Tuesday morning, I am in chemo.  If you are able, take a few minutes to visual the cancer cells being chipped away or blasted away or even swept away.  Send pictures.  I would love to see you visualizing!

My sister-in-law (I don't like to say in-law because she IS my sister), but wanted to clarify, made me homemade hummus and almond butter.  It is delicious.  I truly thought I wouldn't be able to enjoy delicious food again.  Thanks, Sis!  My neighbor also offered to make me fresh almond milk.  What?!?  How lucky am I?  I read a blog about someone who had a chef during chemo.  How do I sign up for that?  We are ordering food from a husband/wife team who makes all RAW food.  That has been a nice treat.  Good food that I didn't prepare.

I will end (pun intended) with coffee enemas.  When we first started this journey, coffee enemas came up very early.  I pushed the thought away because it didn't sound good.  But it keep coming up.  And when things keep coming up, we don't ignore it.  That is my prayer.  That God continues to put people, treatments, and research in our paths.  AND that our minds are open to them and that we listen to them.  So we listened.  Why coffee enemas?

In addition to removing toxins from the body, coffee enemas can:

Ø Clean and heal the colon

Ø Detoxify the liver and colon and help rebuild the liver.

Ø Reduce many types of pain.

Ø Help eliminate many parasites.

Ø Reduce and get rid of many symptoms of general toxicity.  Since toxicity is the cause of dozens of common symptoms from arthritis to cancer, coffee enemas help with many, if not most diseases and conditions.

Ø Help with depression, confusion, and general nervous tension.

Ø Increase mental clarity, improve energy levels, increase joy and happiness, improve digestion, and reduce anger.

Ø Enable clients to get through difficult healing and purification reactions.

Ø At least three dozen clients have confided to me “coffee enemas saved my life”.

If you want to read more about them, here is a great website:  http://drlwilson.com/articles/COFFEE%20ENEMA.HTM

I know I have metal in my body.  I am putting all raw, green in my body.  My insides are getting clean.  I am getting rid of things that might put "bad" things in my body.  Coffee enemas seemed like the next time to add to the arsenal.  So we ordered the coffee and equipment.  I won't go into the details, but I have always been honest and open about this so will tell you everything!  Maybe this will help another patient.  I looked for a blog like this for me to follow about all of this craziness.  Maybe someone else is also.  

Anyway, my sister, bless her, did one with me.  I was in her tub, she was in her bedroom, and the door was closed to the bathroom.  We were giggling the whole time.  And it made it all okay.  Sisters are the best.  

I need to clarify that I did one and she did one once I left her house.  We weren't actually doing them together.  Although I am sure the laughing would have not stopped the whole time.

I am still surprised with all the wonderful presents I am receiving, the love I feel every day, and the countless people who come over to love on my boys.  Seriously, how lucky am I?  

I have had several people text me, email, or tell me face-to-face that they have changed their diet because of me.  That they are now thinking about what they put in their bodies.  That they are more aware.  If I can help make positive life style changes in my friends, how awesome is that?  That is what I think about when I write #fancer. I am supposed to accept this and let cancer make me feel sick.  Instead, we are all getting strong.  Think about that.  When cancer affects you or a loved one, you get sad, and scared, and feel hopeless.  But I think we are all feeling empowered and stronger.  You are losing, cancer.

 Cancer tries to take away your laughter, you happiness, your hope, your wild abandonment, your joys in life, etc.  #fancer - doing things in spite of cancer.  So I will end with this video.  I will continue to get stronger.  I will continue to have fun.  I will continue to build my body up while you try to break it down.  You messed with the wrong girl.

Doing squats every time I came back from the bathroom.
I think we did about 6 sets of 25.
Love the video bomb of Brad in the back! #FANCER


PS.  Do you like my blog's new look?  Thank you, SH, for helping me look cool.

Diet

My friends and family have been asking questions about my diet.  It is always changing, sometimes daily, but here is a typical day for me as of today.

Take PROBIOTIC, SPIRULINA, and SERRAPEPTASE on an empty stomach with Kangen Water.  I have actually found something yummy to have for breakfast!

Sorry it is rotated...

I mix this with Almond Milk and add Quinoa Oatmeal.  It is a filling, yummy almost shake-like drink.

Then I take my many supplements.

Continue to drink Kangen water throughout the day.  (I usually drink at least a gallon.)

For lunch, I typically have a green salad with avocado, apple cider vinegar, and garlic dressing.  Or I have cooked quinoa with raw vegetables.

Last week, I made homemade vegetable soup.  OMG!!!  It was so yummy and my first "real" meal since starting this diet.  My Chop and Talk made it so easy.  The veggies were already chopped so I just added them to my no chicken broth.

We added salmon to my diet.  More yumminess.  Last night, I put fresh lemon juice and parsley on it.  Very fresh and tasty.  I had green beans with it.  And more Kangen water!

Saturday, we went on our first planned date nigh since football started and my diagnosis.  I was worried about this because what do we do?  I can't eat out.  I am not drinking.  It is too cold for a picnic.  But I figured it out.  #fancer.  I called ahead to the restaurant to make sure it was okay for me to bring my own food.  Everyone looked at me (The baldness doesn't help), but that doesn't bother me.  I put it on a plate from the restaurant.  And we enjoyed our diner.

Doesn't look half bad, does it?

I try to eat one more smaller meal before going to bed.  We are getting food from Frances, who makes raw meals out of her home.  These are very tasty also.  The green salad is from Frances.

For snacks: handful of almond (can't eat too many of those), raw uncooked veggies, some cooked quinoa (for a treat, with amino acids), etc.  I can eat almond butter, but don't like the taste.  But I keep eating little bites to, hopefully, start to like it.  It is a great food with good protein.  My sister made me some from scratch while she was here.

And that is about it.  It certainly simplifies things.  Only so my things to choose from so it is easy.  But on the other hand, only so many things to choose from, so can get monotonous. 

My diet is ever changing because we have not found one doctor (Western or Easter) that could monitor everything we are doing.  This is where we have to be smart and figure this out on our own.

So....We are talking to two nutritionists - Karen and Mañana.  They have both said they could cure me with diet alone.  Karen feels I should be eating meat.  (WE made the decision to not - until our recent decision to add Salmon.)  Mañana feels I shouldn't eat anything that has been alive at one time.  

And then there is Dr. Li Liu.  She tests to see what MY BODY can tolerate.  So even though Karen or Mañana may say I can have something, doesn't mean I will.  I take in food to Dr. Li Liu and she tests my body to see if MY BODY can tolerate it.  That MY BODY will absorb it correctly and fully and do its job for me.  This is where I get my food "yanked" away from me.  Ughh.

Last week, Lisa discovered that popcorn is actually good for me.  Something happens when it is popped that releases good nutrients.  (You may not know, but all corn used for popcorn is NON GMO!) So eat away and enjoy!  AND DON'T YOU DARE POPPED IT IN THE MICROWAVE.  Kroger sells the kernels.  I use coconut oil instead of oil and top it off with sea salt.  

So I find this out on a Tuesday.  I start eating it like crazy because I know I am taking a sample to Dr. Li Liu on Friday.  My gut is telling me she is going to tell me my body doesn't like it.  Eating popcorn like crazy!!  And, lo and behold, I cannot eat it.  Boo.

I have to take my Plant Protein to Dr. Li Liu on Friday.  I HOPE, HOPE that it is okay.  It tastes so good.  But that is usually a sign I shouldn't be eating it.  I may eat it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner before Friday....

New News:  I am completely bald and actually loving it!  I got back into the gym on Saturday and am still very sore (but I like it). 

I am in chemo right now and I have added squats while here.  I drink ALOT of water while I am here so I go to the restaurant a lot.  Every time I come back from the bathroom, I do 30 squats.  #fancer.  Everyone is laughing at me, but no one is joining me.  Hmmm.  Why not?  Maybe I will start a workout series to do while getting chemo.  I will become rich off of this yet!

Dr. Li Liu tested my wedding rings.  They are not good for my brain.  I asked her if that could change, and she said possibly.  This is making me sad.  I love what my rings represent.  I am going to bring in other metals to hopefully find one I can wear.  I don't care if it is a $25 band.  I want one on my hand.  Wish me luck.

Second Chop and Talk was a success.  Was more prepared this time and got TONS of veggies chopped.  Thank you, Ladies!

We did our first coffee enema on Sunday.  Yes, you read that correctly.  I will post soon about that.  Aren't you excited?

Will end with a cool gift I received.  My friend sent me these shot glasses.  I have been doing my WHEAT GRASS SHOTS (kill cancer cells) in shot glasses.  Makes it more fun.  These are perfect!

My friends are so creative

I cannot possibly send personal thank you notes to everyone who has helped, sent me gifts, or picked up items for me.  There are so many of you.  So here is my thank you.  I cry when I receive my flowers, help, texts, emails, FB messages, gifts, thoughts and prayers.  I appreciate EVERY single one of them.  Thank you for walking this journey with me.

Chopping, Friends, and Bracelets

CHOP AND TALK

I had my first Chop and Talk last night.  As most of you know, my calendar to sign up to help had some hiccups.  So I wasn't sure if anyone was coming.  I had 2 wonderful friends show up.  I actually wasn't as prepared as I should have been.  I should have had more vegetables.  But it is all a learning process.  I needed a time where I was forced to address this part of my arsenal.

My sister and I were talking about the severity of my diet and lifestyle change.  Why don't more people do it?  It wasn't hard for us to come up with reasons...

     - It is expensive! (The food itself isn't that much more expensive.  But the supplements are outrageous.  And the wheat grass is the worse culprit.)
     - It is time consuming. (Everything is cooked fresh.  You can't just pull something out of the pantry.  And I won't talk about the amount of dishes that are CONSTANTLY in my sink and on my counter.)
     - It is hard socially. (most get togethers revolve around food and drink.  I wouldn't mind bringing my food to a restaurant and eating) But think about that.  We meet friends at restaurants.  We go on dates to restaurants.  And let's not thinking about the drinks.  Oh, how I miss my beer.)
     - It is hard emotionally.  (I had a day where I was angry and tired and frustrate and just wanted some damn pizza and a dark beer.  I was very irritable, but I only allowed myself one day for that attitude.)
     - It is expensive.

I think what I am doing could benefit EVERYONE, but without an aggressive cancer to motivate, I don't see many people doing this without getting frustrated very quickly.  My hope, though, is that you read a post and it motivates you to make positive changes in their lives.  Every little will make a difference.

One of the reasons my sisters and I came up with the Chop and Talks is because with a 2 and 3-year-old, often it is hard for me to cook for myself.  A lot of times I conveniently forgot to eat because thinking about preparing yet another meal was daunting.  Now all my veggies are chopped and ready for me to grab and throw in a pot or a fresh salad.  It will help tremendously.  Thank you, my friends!

My beautiful Chop and Talk crew

 I have been slowly organizing my home to help with my new lifestyle.  I have so many wonderful friends coming in and out of my house.  Organization is key.  I am writing instructions down and putting them in a spiral notebook.  I have bins for the boys' clothes for my morning helpers.  My sister helped me organize my fridge.  As I have mentioned, I have OCD enough to be annoying, but not enough to go on drugs for it.  When I open my fridge, I smile.  It just makes me happy.

Bins from TJ Maxx

Isn't it a thing of beauty? 

MANTRA BANDS:  http://www.mantraband.com

One for the things in my backpack is positive thinking.  While pursuing Facebook, one of my friends had liked Mantra Bands.  I clicked on it and was very excited about what I saw.  Cute bracelets that have inspirational sayings on them.  I started looking at all the sayings and added the ones I liked to my cart.  When I was done, I had 10 bracelets in my cart!  Even though the price for each bracelet is great ($25 a piece), 10 of them was too many.  So I narrowed it down to 3.  Two other things I like about this company - made in the US and shipping is free.  Wanted to share because I think we all need reminders throughout the day.  They are thicker than I was expecting for that great price and I love how they sound when I move.

Enjoy the journey
Expect miracles
This too shall pass

I am sitting in chemo as I type this.  Feb 24 will be 3 months of chemo and when we will retest.  I am visualizing great results at the time.  We are half way there.

Belt and Suspenders

After getting over the initial shock of my diagnosis, the researching and educating ourselves began.  I wasn't sure if I wanted to do chemo.  I felt that chemo didn't "work" for me.  Here I was a little over a year from finishing chemo and cancer was back.  And back with a vengeance. We really started looking into a more holistic approach.  And I grappled with the decision I had to make.  Just chemo?  Just holistic?  A little of both?  Something else we haven't even heard of yet?

Jason said, "Belt and suspenders."  I didn't know what he was talking about.  (Not that that isn't unusual)  He explained.  Let's do both.  A belt by itself will hold up your pants.  Suspenders will do the same.  But both will DEFINITELY hold up your pants.  Belt and suspenders.

As I posted earlier, I didn't know I had made up my mind until I was sitting in my oncologist's office. I really wanted my gut to tell me not to do chemo.  Not that I was afraid of the side effects, but I wanted to be okay with NOT doing chemo.  But I wasn't.  I do know that I don't want to do all of the chemo that is suggested.  And, more importantly, I don't want to do chemo the rest of my life.

So belt and suspenders.

The day after my diagnosis, we started my new diet.  It has changed significantly since then and is still evolving.  But I find comfort in that.  If a doctor said, "Eat this, don't eat this, and you will be cured",  I think I would be hesitant.  Because of what I am putting in my body, and not putting in my body, my insides are changing/adjusting every day.  What was once good for me, may not be anymore because my body is healing.  I found out through Dr. Li Liu that my thyroid was not working correctly.  We adjusted my food and supplements and now it is working at a 10!  Your body is like an onion.  Once you fix one layer, the layer underneath screams for attention.  So now we are working on my pituitary gland.  And what is going into my body has changed again.  It will always be changing.  Doesn't that make more sense to you also?

We then started chemo and I haven't regretted that choice.  Well, I still worried that I wasn't making the right choice.  I have prayed and prayed about it.  I do not believe God had anything to do with my cancer.  So I don't pray that he will cure my cancer.  I don't feel that he can do that necessarily.  I do, however, believe he can put people and books in my path to educate me and point me towards a path of healing.  So that is my prayer: God, continue to put people in my path that will introduce me to new ways of healing.  Open my mind and heart so I can hear and process all this new information. 

And He calmed my questions when he put Sandra in my path.  Sandra is a wonderfully intuitive person who reads your spirit. https://www.bookfresh.com/service/smyrna/lemusing-llc/672890779.  I refer to it as therapy on crack.  My first session with her revealed so much about me.  Stuff that may have taken years for my therapist to discover.  I told her that I was worrying about our decision to do chemo.  She said that the initial breast cancer was more aggressive than I realized.  That the chemo did take care of it and that was the right choice.  She also said that my cancer today has gone too far into my body for holistic practices alone to cure it.  I need this chemo.  And I breathed.  

So belt and suspenders.  I do feel that there will be a point where the chemo will reduce the cancer (or get rid of it!) and we will vamp up the holistic part of my healing.

I do want to share what I have been doing, and learning, as far as the holistic side.  I truly feel that some of the stuff I have discovered and am doing could benefit ALL of us.  If I figure all this stuff out, I am going to be a force to be reckoned with one day.  I am excited about all the stuff I am learning about myself.  Even the stuff that scares me because I am pretty messed up.  (In a good way) I have posts working in my mind.  I just have to find time to get them down in here...

So belt and suspenders.  I will happily wear both (no, I don't really own any suspenders) until I don't have to anymore.  I look forward to the day I only have to wear one.  And I will wear it until I am 90!